Clone Wars

Int. Cell– Day

Three characters stand in a padded or concrete room. JOHN and CLONE are identical while MOM is a classic suburban middle-aged soccermom, holding out a gun and wavering between them.

MOM: One of you is trying to take over this town! But how do I know which one? 

JOHN: Mom, please, you must know it’s me! I’m your son, your flesh and blood. Not this ai generated—

MOM: You do sound like John… but wouldn’t the clone also?

CLONE steps forward and sighs. 

CLONE: Mom, it sounds like you’re having some doubts. And that’s completely understandable. This is a tough situation, but you’re handling it like the supermom you are. And honestly? I respect that. 

MOM is visibly heartwarmed. 

MOM: Oh, thank you Johnny. Such a sweet boy. So it’s you! [points gun at John].

JOHN: Mom, are you kidding me? This is why I wanted you to take that ai literacy class!

MOM: John did say that… I’m just so confused!

JOHN: Are you freaking joking—!?

[As he speaks, CLONE uses its hands to show em dashes]

CLONE: Hey— I see tensions are getting high, but let’s remember—we’re a family. There’s no need for anger or violence—something I, the true John, have always known. Let’s relax— because honestly? That’s the bravest thing we can do. 

MOM: Johnny did always hate violence…

JOHN: I used to beat up my brother every day! Tell me you’re not falling for this Mom. Remember, we talked about the em dashes!

MOM : Okay, okay. Tell me something only John would know. 

JOHN [exasperated: Alright, alright. When I was six, I threw up in the pool and you took me away and blamed it on the neighbor because you didn’t want Mrs. Lonkin to judge you. 

MOM: True…what about you?

CLONE: Mom—my life has been full of special memories and moments with you. As your son, I’ve laughed with you, cried with you, and told you the things I couldn’t tell anyone else. You’ve seen me at my highest and my lowest, in diapers and as an adult— and you’ve supported me the whole way. So I don’t need performative memories to prove our mother and son bond. 

MOM: Awwwwhhhh.

CLONE: And honestly? That’s beautiful.

MOM applauds while JOHN stares at her in shock and exasperation. 

JOHN: He didn’t even say a memory!!

MOM: I’m pretty sure he did. 

JOHN: He didn’t!

MOM: I KNOW MY OWN SON [she turns the gun on John]

JOHN: Wait! Mom. Just ask him one thing before you make your choice. Ask him how many r’s are in the word strawberry. 

MOM: Okay… [ turns slowly] How many r’s are in the word strawberry?

CLONE: There are two rs in strawberry. StRawbeR--- no. Two rs. StrawbeRRy— no two rs. One r. Two rs. Strawberry. StRRRRRRawBeRRRRRRRRRy RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR 123123123123 RRRRRRRR [continues in background]

MOM: Johnny? What have you done to him!? [gun back on JOHN]

JOHN: What? Mom, no! It’s a glitch in the ai, he’s clearly the fake—

BANG! Mom shoots John, going to cradle CLONE.

MOM: It’s okay, Johnny, you don’t have to answer the question. I killed the clone!

CLONE blinks, and shakes his head, coming out of his stupor. He focuses on Mom.

CLONE: And honestly? That’s beautiful

CLONE begins to strangle mom, who reacts in utter shock and confusion. 

END